I just saw this from advice columnist Carolyn Hax in reply to
a woman in pain wanting to talk to her boyfriend:
"Make the decision, now, that this relationship is over; even if he comes around,
even if he's contrite, you're done.
Deciding that you'll never stand to be treated this way again would be restorative in itself.
But if you go beyond that and take deliberate steps to restart your life as a single person --
as opposed to waiting around for him to make it all okay again -- then you're acting on that
decision. And rising to that (admittingly) formidable challenge taps into the most reliable
pain-relief available: proof that you don't live at the end of anybody's leash."
I haven't checked it out myself, but she has a weekly chat at noon on Fridays:www.washingtonpost.com/discussions
hope this helps . . . peace,